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to the lurkers

Writer: Amanda RiddellAmanda Riddell

I don't think my voice changes when I'm high. Again, we've never met IRL since I transitioned (yes, medical isn't the only sort of transition .. social transitions are real too👍), B, and several of my fans have never seen me IRL.


You have no idea what I'm really like, and that's a two-way street. -


I realise everyone thought they were being encouraging and/or helpful with their suggestions; it's my career, and it's my life, though, so back off and let me plan my own career. This winter is about my guitar playing. I'm sick of singing, and I'm still not keen to play my own piece: I want to dive into the NZ guitar rep to prove that I've still got the chops. I think playing my own pieces has mostly been shit for my career: now people think I'm a popstar or a shallow one-trick pony, while the point was to demo songs. 🐸 -


The advice hasn't encouraged me. It's pissed me off, and forced me to go all legalistic to prove that I'm a pro who understands how to protect their creations from unscrupulous people who wish to exploit me. -


I don't want to play Jo. I don't want to make a stage musical.


I'm simply not doing that. I hate the theatre. I'm used to classical gigs, where the craft is superb; usually, crap gigs are due to a lack of feeling, while theatre is the opposite: lots of feelings, but not as much craft, so it usually feels phoney to me. Ethan's note about the play -- half the actors were shouting rather than projecting and it felt tacky, though the set was impressive. I mean, he's my mate, so I'm not surprised he disliked the Circa play.


You lot of opera and theatre buffs may love the theatre and being the centre of attention, but I hate it. I'm so sick of it, and my profile was a reaction to that. -

Only via FB could I have become famous: I'm allergic to most of the places the cool kids hang out. 🤣


-


I covered the shit that the arsehole pros wanted to hear while I had the beard. That's also why I felt like shaving: I felt I'd said my piece.


And I prefer to live as a woman. I think people treat me differently with the beard, but I don't think I'm any cleverer or anything like that: I was in a lucid mood this week due to the mental health people confronting me about my blog. I definitely think the nurse was nicer when I was clean-shaven. That's why I shave.

 
 
 

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