the demon on my shoulder

Well, I'd say that internalised transphobia is the main one; that's the voice in my head that thinks people are out to get me. There's also real transphobia, so my lived experience is a mix of those two things, and my fear of similar things happening in the future. There's also a sense that my sexuality is somehow abnormal, and that is something that I have mixed feelings about. That's a whole other kettle of fish.