being delusional

The hardest thing about being crazy and a minor celebrity (which wasn't my goal 😒) is that I spend most of my day reading the tea leaves via the news or via YouTube. It's a gimmick: I riff on my YouTube feed as a way of generating material for my monologues, and occasionally my FB feed too. FB's too real, though; going to Question Time means that the Greens MP's all recognise me, and probably a bunch from the other parties too. - So yeah, I'm lonely and bored, but people are also paying attention to my rants. It's a difficult balance, and I do find myself losing that sense of reality from time to time. To me, today felt like the walls closing in, which only redoubled my desire to say no. - Bluntly: I went insane at Isentia because I was leading a double life, and that eventually became too difficult for me. While I think the RNZ gig slowed my spiralling insanity, and then I lost my mind after they stopped calling me into the office. I'm not returning as a guy; I'll wait 'till the laws change, thank you very much. 👋