How dysphoria evolves

I think a lot of non-trans people think that dysphoria is static, and one always has an ideal man or woman that we're intending to become. That's not how I feel about it; since I came out, it's felt like a battle to find a happy medium where I'm expressing myself and being accepted that way. - For me, one thing that I wasn't dysphoric about when I came out was my body hair: I came out with a beard because I had confidence that I was pulling it off, but it seemed to send a slightly gayer message than I was hoping. People certainly found the idea of calling me Amanda easier after I started shaving my body hair, so now that's a major source of dysphoria: like, when it gets too thick I start to feel like I'm not woman enough, which might explain the paranoia about people who might wish me to detransition. I'll add here that the whole illusion of clevage hinges on shaving my hair. That's apparently one of my better features, and that's why. It wasn't when I was hairy.