Weeded Out: the screenplay

First up, I had a whole bunch of so-called friends whinging that they felt that script was too close to their lives and how dare I portray them that way? Then, I spent a trip in Auckland explaining shit to Wellingtonians, and advertised my script because I thought it might be viable. Then I watched myself and decided I wasn't keen, and also that the very idea of filming it made me suicidal. It still does. Particularly now that people have told me their bullshit ideas for it. Bear in mind that last time we made a 'real' film, I got assaulted by my brother. That, plus all my theoretical collaborators are scared shitless of me because my tapes are rather aggressive. It's agitprop: it's as theatrical as Question Time. 🐝 - That's how angry I am that drugs are still illegal and anti-trans critics think that they have the right to tell me what to wear. That's what keeps me motivated. 🏳️‍⚧️ I don't think my Weeded Out script will legalise drugs or significantly improve trans vibes. It's Wellington: everyone already knows that's how Wellington is, and it's not as though that's ever changed the minds of hick New Zealanders. Taking potshots at Wellington has become a national pastime the way it was to take potshots at Auckland when I was a kid, so forgive me if a bunch of showbiz liberals and their lame ideas haven't persuaded me. -

My complaint is that I think your idea for my EP songs and Beyond is a shit musical.

That's a real complaint

That's a valid complaint.

I mean, look at my 2030 script, and you tell me whether those are better situations and better integrated songs; all you want is some pub rock numbers. Whereas my goal is to use those pub rock numbers to help people swallow the bitter pill that is my 2030 script.

That's insulting to my songwriting instinct.

That's why I keep saying no.

You can do it, I'm just not going to agree.

You can buy it, adapt it and do it.

I'm happy with that.

You'll still end up paying me, but it won't be so much, and we'll all feel better. That's a satisfying answer, right? Like, pay me $20,000 or something, then rewrite it with songs that aren't by me. -

I mean, it'd still be the same story; that's what I mean by 'it's a shit musical' -- if the songs could be switched with any other pop song, then it's a shit musical. While imagine my 2030 script with zero songs. It's very difficult, right? That's what we call an 'integrated' musical: the songs are the engine which drives that story forward.

That's what Stephen Sondheim taught me to write. That's a moment where I choose to chuck that legacy in people's faces. I mean, some of you might be very good at musicals, but that's a very rare tape.✊